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November 10, 2008

Maybe I need professional help

Ever since I got pregnant last year my...intuitions....have been SO much stronger than they ever where before. My mommy friends know what I'm talkin about, right? Case-in-point: Sometime last year/early this year we had gone to my parents' house and got home very late. After we went up to bed, I layed there thinking that *something* just didn't feel right. I couldn't tell what it was, but something was off. I said something to Tommy, which prompted him to get up, grab his handgun, and proceed to check the house. I layed there in bed waiting to her a gunshot. Luckily, I did not. He did, however, come back to bed and say to me "I will never doubt you when you say something is wrong. The back door was unlocked." Weird.
So, now you are probably wondering what "mommy intuition" has to do with needing professional help, right? Don't laugh at me here. We were at my parents' on Halloween this year. Once the tiny one was in bed, we (myself, Tommy, my mom, my brother, and my brother's girlfriend) decided to watch a movie. Our movie of choice was The Strangers. Now, I don't know if any of you have seen this movie so I won't go into too many details. But, it was based on a true story. And it scared the CRAP out of me. I hardly got ANY sleep that night, even though we watched Baby Mama afterwards. Seriously, the movie traumatized me.
Here's where I think I may need professional help. If I go to bed before Tommy does, I have to keep the hallway light on and keep my bedroom door open. If I go to feed TJ in his room in the middle of the night I have to check behind me 90000 times and uncover his nightlight (the thing is SO bright, he won't sleep if it isn't covered). If I'm downstairs by myself at night, I turn on as many lights as possible and make sure that all of the window blinds are shut and that the front door is locked.
Last night TJ woke at about 2:30am to eat. I went into his room and didn't shut the door all the way. A few minutes later, my cat decided she wanted to nudge the door open a bit. Which scared the CRAP out of me. And of course since the whole house is completely silent I can hear every little noise that houses make (you know the ones). Then, the stupid cat goes into Kaitlyn's room and jumps on her bed. Then off the bed. Then on the bed. Then off the bed. Which made a series of loud banging noises and shook the whole floor (stupid cat is VERY fat).
I thought I was going to have a heart attack. I sat there, with TJ still nursing, staring at his half-open bedroom door trying to figure out if the shadows in the hallway were a person standing there watching me or just my imagination getting the best of me, almost waiting for some weirdo to come into my baby's room and do God-knows-what.
Which also reminds me...every time I am in my kitchen late at night (and this happened before I watched that freakin movie) I feel like someone is watching me. Even if the blinds on the back door and the window in the kitchen are closed.
You all are probably sitting there laughing at me now. That's ok, I try to laugh at me too...sometimes it makes me feel better. I definately won't be watching any movies like that any time soon...if ever again...and if this paranoia keeps up I may consider seeking professional help.

1 comments:

Testy Testy Test said...

I'm so much more sensitive to these things after having a baby. I used to love scary movies, but not so much now. I have opted not to watch "The Strangers."